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20070810

ALL THESE YEARS - 1

Days go on and on waiting no one. But still here I am, the same old me, can’t even move foot even one step far. Life’s so tough and it sucks! Oh…. Is it really sucks or may be it is us that make our life suck! Damn true.

Oh... I’m about to get to use to writing and it moves, don’t you think? Huh, it shows that I’m confused about myself I think, being grown up from a mess up life, to say, but who knows it’s the way of God.

Every family’s wish is to live a happy life and raise their children to be someone successful in their life. But not every one could do that. As we live in this nonstop world of race in every kind of ways, the first thing man needs is money, money! Without money it feels like that’s no used of living. Being raised up from a healthy, middle class family, I was happy and find happiness from the love of my parents and family members. You have good friends and your name was the most popular around your neighborhood in a way of being a cool and smart kid, so sporty. But every child can’t be like that. Yes I feel so good and happy being a smart kid. But hold on… my life changes, my world spin around up side down! Got two younger brother and sister. At that time I was just 9years young. You know what, every mans’ problem can’t be compared to other’s. It was Saturday evening after having lunch; I went to my father’s room where he lie down on the bed, so weak, can’t even talk a word. Next to him was my mother sitting helplessly just waiting her husband for his last breadth! Oh God… I can picture it. It was so pain.

My dad was a kind man, cared for his children. And if am not mistaken, I knew that he only beat me just once for misbehaving. He was a talented man good in writings and also loves to play games. About my mom, can’t imagine what my life would be like if my mom is not by my side. She scolds me, cared for me, brought me to church and teaches me how to behave, always pray for me. In one sense I can describe my mom as a bad mom! Ha ha… She gave us punishment if we are not obeying her rules in anyway. Many of her students feel the same but anyone who keeps her words became a great person. Mothers Love is the greatest love in this world.

Just about five to tem minutes past, I can feel tears falling from my eyes. I can’t take off my eyes from staring my dad’s face. I heard crying around me and I started crying too. This is how I bid my dad a “GOODBYE”. Not even a word from my dad. I wander what would it be if he could say a word to me- will it be “ I love You” or “Goodbye” or “Be a man” or “ Be obedient”…….. I’m just curious and also it will be worth remembering all my life if it was only just a letter! My mom stood from her seat and calms us down. There were some family members and relatives too. She had a word of prayer and bid her husband a last goodbye. What did God want from us, what did He plan for us? All we could do is wait and see, have to live with faith and hope. Still there was my mom and my family members who could take care of me. Thanks to God for that. Though it’s hard to live without Dad, we got to move on. Life goes on.....